I'm going home today! Sooni graduates from high school tomorrow, and I know it sounds silly, but I'm really proud of her. I always thought it was weird when people were proud of others for graduating from high school, cuz it's kind of like - how hard is it? But I'm proud of her because it's like she's all grown up - I feel like she's my daughter. I know that she got the most attention from my mom, but I also feel like I played a big part in raising her - I'm so happy with the way she has turned out. True, many times I've wanted to up and kick her ass for being so bitchy, but when she's cool, she's soooo cool that it makes up for all of the bad times. Lately, though... I don't even know what to do about her. But is it my place to do anything? It has to be, right? Cuz I can't just sit by while she gets hurt, physically and emotionally. I've always protected her, and it kills me that I can't be there with her anymore to make sure she's safe. I wish she would move down here with me - if she would, then I would wait until the next year to go to South Africa. She needs to leave Durham - I wish that there were a bus that takes everyone away from that damned town right after graduation... like it would take you anywhere you wanted to go, as long as you went SOMEWHERE - Durham after high school is like a black hole that sucks you in and refuses to let you make anything of yourself or do anything with your life. Anyway, I just hope that I'm able to help Sooni when I go home... I love that girl, and she deserves to be happy. She's only 18, and she doesn't need stress like this... I'm gonna go home and make her have some fucking fun.

My voice might be coming back! I can squeak today, as opposed to the last two days when I could only whisper.

Steve, Norm, and Daco came over last night to eat my food, and Steve and Norm had the funniest conversation ever... I couldn't say anything at the time because it's hard to be sarcastic when you have no voice - you just can't convey the same attitude with a whisper. Anyway, they were discussing what would be the best way to be eaten alive... huh?!? Apparently, pirahnas would totally suck, but if an alligator bit into your head and snapped your neck, then it probably wouldn't be too bad cuz you'd die so quickly... those boys make me smile.

Marc brought me chicken soup and Annie brought me medicine - it was so sweet!

I have one more paper - due on Friday (10-15 pages, haven't started yet) and then only one final on Thursday. Then school's over... this year has gone by so freaking quickly - I can't even believe it. Even more incredulous is the miraculous aboutface that I pulled this year. At the beginning quarter I hated it here - I hated my life. All I wanted was to go home and hug my mom. I hate to be cheezy, but Alpha Phi Omega has been my saving grace. The people in my fraternity are the best around, and they showed me that I have a place at UCSD. They showed me that I am not just a nameless face in the crowd, but a person deserving of friendship and happiness. Honestly, some of the most wonderful people I've ever known are in APO. After joining, I felt more confident, happier, and more independent. I know that it's okay for me to be myself - people will love me anyway. Thank you to everyone who helped me get through this year - most of you don't even know how much you helped me, which makes me appreciate you all the more.

Stupid Sarah. Stupid Louisa. Fine guys - I didn't want to see you at all this summer anyway! I guess I'll just see you for a week at Christmas, and then it's off to South Africa and you won't get to see me for nine months... you guys suck. But I love you anyway.

I'm so tired. But for the most part, I'm happy. I just have to get this paper done and I'm home free. And I have to get my voice back...